Cookie

2008-05-13T20:11:00.001+08:00

wished that you could hug me from the back.. telling me you love me.

2008-05-13T20:05:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, it's true that honey moon period will never last. Neither does promises.

I m always praying for the right one. Maybe I didn't treasure in the first place but when i realized that it's my fault, I will change.

And when always I learn to change , it's always too late for me.

Sometimes, I hope you could understand how I felt. It isn't easy to control one's emotion esp to find out that someone you loved changed.

I've stopped clubbing, Hanging out with friends... even stop wearing my favourtie clothes. Laided down my pride and ego. Neglected my best friends. Lied to my friends.

Now my life is just like monotone. At times... I wished.... I wish... I could think for myself.

2008-03-03T01:04:00.001+08:00

:(... can anyone tell me where to download programme like "hello" , for fast uploading of photos for mac version? :(

WOO

2008-02-21T08:15:00.001+08:00

Sorry peeps! busy with my new life and my camera is spoilt so kinda lose interest in blogging. Update soon!!! KEKEKE..

2007-11-17T21:25:00.001+08:00

I gave up. I called him, asking if he wants to go swimming ( thou it's just an excuse to patch things up with him) and I thought that I could spend a whole night with him but guess what.. He said he's going out and I could come if I want to. ( WTF?) And where he's going?

you got it right. PLUSH.

I broke down then I hang up on him. He did mention that he already promised his friends. How about me? I could leave my friends behind just to spend time with him but he can never stop clubbing for me.

I swear this is my biggest regret. And I cannot stop myself from crying

2007-11-17T11:18:00.000+08:00

PART1

Couldn't sleep well. Dream of him , it's a very short dream like a few seconds but on and off. Like i could feel his existence in the room, pretty scary thou ( often have such dreams which wakes me up then when I go back to sleep, it will pop up again repeatedly - only when I had booze) The person which often pop out are even your last seen person, or that person which you've been thinking about. Then that's when I woke up and check on my hp for his messages. None, but what can he still say now... =\ I want the rose.

We often break then patch things up within a day or 2. It's been the 2nd day and I don't see him. Probably it's the right choice that we shouldn't even think about patching back.... I've started to miss him already since i walk away. I feel like calling him up but yeah, he just gonna throw me with sacarstic comments again which is rather more hurting.

How does he feel at this very moment? Is he masturbating or thinking about me?

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

I missssss him soo.... much. Esp when out of no where, he will tell me he loves me, pulling my head towards his and start kissing me on my forehead, nose and lips. Then he will give me those really really small little cute eyes expression... =\

PART2

Went to lie down after the first post but couldn't sleep. Then I started hugging my maki ( A big round soft ball with just a pair of big black dots and a smiley look with a small tall on the other end ) He spend $20 just to catch it for me (whether is it for his excitment or me but I gonna take it as it's for me.... FEELS BETTER WHAT RIGHT...) and he gave me as a surprise! I was jumping in joy when he pop maki on my face. :(((( (not literally jumping)

That's when I wanna msg him so badly. I have a few msgs which I didn't send out. like

" Maki says hi. TEEHEE??? "

" Swimming????? "

" HELLO :D?? "

" I miss you "

" Come back YOU FUCKING CHEZEBYE " - exaggerated. LOL

HUNGRY! I MISS UDON. Today is a saturday and it's 11.53am. Probably heading down to school then home to sleep. =\

Pretty tired of clubbing . The reason I went to club was, I need a booze and attention being diverted. And I never like the feeling where you're feeling so sad and you stay at home which makes you feel even more blue and KNEWING THAT THAT GUY IS DEFINATELY GOING TO PARTY. -_______-

That one = CLIMAX

I bet he's gonna club again. Sometimes, I really wish he could spend some time doing meaningful things with me rather than clubbing. OK, IT JUST CAME INTO MY MIND, LOL.

We go get a big big book then put our photos in. Write stuff and decorate it! (yeah what.. he will like.. " what the fuck?! " then start laughing then change topic) It's seems gay but it's actually sweet. Or we could just watch tv in his living room together? go to the beach?

I guess nothing interest him that's why he would choose to club. I guess I couldn't interest him at all or we share no interests... I find it really hurting when I can't think of anything to do or can't suggest anything? And his mindset is already - nothing to do , CLUB or CINE which means that whatever I suggest which shows him little or no interest at all = CLUB , which is to me = CLIMAX

And when I asked, "go cine do what?" "Don't know"

It's so lifeless, everyday is just the same routine. If I would to spend my days being so lifeless with him, I'd rather spend it with him when his friends aren't around. You know girls, don't you like it when you're out with your boyfriends, they give you almost all their attention to you? I mean don't you girls like it? I do.. I really do and in fact, I don't mind just roaming around town with him alone or anywhere.

This is getting no where. I need to let go; I have to...

And I m just gonna say this for last time (if we patch then no more last time) and I really really mean it last time.. because after this.. I'm really letting go. ( IF WE PATCH THEN DIFFERENT THING ... )

I think you all know lah. LOL

2007-11-17T07:38:00.001+08:00

I want you.. so badly. Do you?

2007-11-17T07:23:00.001+08:00

He left me and it was for good. I guess the fault really lies on me because I tried so hard... knewing that it didn't satisfy him yet I didn't try harder.

I wanna know how does he actually feels. When he tries to hurt me with his words, does he feel anything? When he gets mad over my mistakes, does he feel anything when he tells me off with harsh words? When we argued , does he feel anything if I would to walk away? Does he even feeel anything when he kissed me? or when he said " love you too" before he hung up the phone?

Does he really mean it when he said he won't leave me? Does he really mean it when he says he doesn't want to love me anymore.....?

I swear I changed. I swear I tried sooo hard. I swear I kept my temper to myself. I swear I fork out most of my time for him. I swear I wanna be with him. I swear I love him.

If only he could give in... a little.

2007-11-08T02:13:00.000+08:00

I miss yannie.
I miss kaiting.
I miss raymond.

I miss all my old friends.. where have you people been..

2007-11-08T00:18:00.001+08:00

I don't know how much more do I need to do to prove that I really tried.

these are the msgs which I replied but didn't send.

"i on the bus, on my way home. i seee black people, like tons? where you !!!?'

"ok, movie where? let me go home shower first."

" don't go... all I wanted is you to understand how i felt instead of me but you just keep flaring at me and all u wanted is to club.All you wanted me is to do things which you like. U have never wanted to go fishing with me. you have never wanted overseas with me. all you wanted is to go cine slack then club... how about me? Have you even ask what do i like? you didn't because it's all about you. Just because i done you wrong, i m changing for better but you just keep taking me for granted. and for your sake, i did whatever i could to click with your friends but what they did to me? Aren't they even grateful? or probably they don't feeel it? or maybe i haven't done better... i love you so much, i tried to control my temper towards you but why do you keep using harsh words on me..."

but the saddest part is, we could never put down our ego for love.

guess what? FUCK IT MAN. It's yourself ... everything is about you. It's time for me to have my own life.

2007-10-18T04:11:00.001+08:00

hilmi!
Platte knife painting.
water colour sunflower, if you observe carefully, i painted on the wrong side of the canvas. fuck..
painting on texturize surface. lazy to complete
had the gardasil* ( the vaccination for cervical cancer, you girls should go get it!)
New privilege! on the right. only the colour difference..

tiring man..

process

despite how tired we are, corde was still ever sweet to buy dinner and arrange nicely for me.
that's my lecturer
our workshop.
i drilled a hole. ^^
SICKENING
YOU HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA HOW TIRING IT IS TO DE-BARK THIS SHIT

I GRIND THIS SHIT LIKE FUCK OK. FUCKING DUSTY
i gave hunnie 5 mins to buy me a rose to forgive him. TEEHEE. i love him
awww...
YEAH... he came to accompany me. and he did this.
got different position too

Decoration. Using rose petals and ciggies. lOl
Welcome to my studioo! more like my 2nd home.
Few of my sculptures. ^^^^^^^^^

corde says it looks like a vagina. *_|_*

2007-10-18T04:01:00.001+08:00

Busy with derek and school lately. Birthday coming soon, 2nd nov and my keyboard is fucked up. WOO, learnt alot recently. Like responsiblities, being reasonable and putting yourself in other's shoes. Btw, My camera is spoilt after that fat chan stepped on it. I have ton of photos but extremely lazy to post up as the "HELLO" programme doesn't work anymore. WTFffFFFf.......

http://psychtraveller.livejournal.com/485135.html#cutid1

http://psychtraveller.livejournal.com/?skip=20

Check this baby out, i m a fan of hers.

2007-09-17T08:13:00.001+08:00

Melvin : Hey whore , heard you go around telling people that you went with me so you can get free trips to japan hong kong all eh, good job.

Me :i've never say such things. and eversince we stop contact, i have not spoken anything about you.

FACT : Get real, Before i got together with you, how would i know your dad wants me to go overseas with you? Basically he was the one who insist me on going and you're the one who wanted the hong kong trip, not me.

Melvin : You and your mom really have the same genes. Cheap cunning and worthless.

Amanda: i didn't say anything. That's all i can say now.

Fact : You're insulting me and I m still keeping my cool. Don't push your luck fatty.

Melvin : Then why Jun hong all those people know. You got a high reputation as a whore already now still want start this.

Amanda : derek spoke to jun hong. jun hong says that he hasn't spoke to you for 2 years. Are you kidding me or something?

FACT : It;s not the first time where he use someone's name as a scapegoat. He used HENRY, he used SHAUN , he used CHRIST. high reputation? What u mean? Can fight with you not? leat i don't buy friends using money, i don't talk big , I don't seek attention. LOL. Attention seekers.
" Eh, you know how many cars i got???? " "I race with 30 subarus, they alll went missing when i turned." "My porsche 300 horsepower won a 400 horsepower -dunno what car- which apears on hotstuff. U SAW THAT?!" Right, even ah Dog was laughing at you when he saw you losing to tht car.

Melvin: People spreading around . Please stop being so cheap and i might drive pass geylang and see you working there someday.

Amanda; Sigh, you just can't stop boosting your ego, trying to encourage yourself everytime yo get exposed. Have fun loser. I bet he's laughing at the stories you made up after being exposed. Bomb.

FACT: i didn't know i was so famous despite my low profile image for the pass few years. How to be cheap? you k now i think i worth more than you? yon're absoutely nothing without your father.'s wealth and money. i've education and true friends - BTW, i don't buy them-
. You? Nothing.

Melvin: a loser is better than being a whore who sleep with guys for money, even my dad knows you as tanjong rhu blowjob no.1.

amanda : WAH, i bet your dad went there often, That's how he got to know your mom. Woots.

FACT: why tanjong rhu? hey, issit that whore is the only word u can use against me? LOL desn't other words fit ME? FACT, there isn't because, i dont talk big, i don't show off, i m NOT A HYPOCRITE NOR A LIAR. I DON'T MADE UP STORIES TO BOOST MY SELF ESTEEM , I DON'T DO THINGS WIHTOUT A REASON, I DON'T GO AROUND INSULTING PEOPLE TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER, I DON'T GO AROUND TELLING MY FRIENDS TO DO THINGS FOR ME AND LASTLY, I DON'T HAVE BODY ODOUR. You got a funny dad. I tanjong rhu blowjob no.1 , I WISH.. LOL , then derek gonna be the most fortunate guy!

Let's say 'I number 1 blow job in tanjong rhu, your mother number 2 - that's why your dad is so in love with her but he still can't get me! - your aunt number 3 that's why your uncle have her so what now, your dad jealous? awww.. orh luh orh luh... "

Melvin: That's why your mom is stupid. Wit, A shit useless daughter like you. Go work ktv. All show off my car telling people it's your. poor ass.

Fact: My mum was quite intelligent to tell that you're "bombing" stories to her and she actually find it annoying. LOL ( see the way she complains to derek , damn funny) I don't reply on others basically except for y dad for financial wise. In future, I can work myself. you? no education. If your dad doesn't exist, you have nothing. Get it? you play drugs, YOU PLAY CHEAP DRUGS LIKE COUGH SYRUP. oh yeah, about your car, i've never told anyone it's mine. please, I DON'T BEHAVE LIKE YOU. STOP MAKING ME SOUND LIKE YOU. (lucky you can't make me smell like you, eew) i m not like you " Aiya, that lumbo used to be mine but i crash it on the first day when i got my license. Nobody knows. (REALLY? *AMAZED*)

Melvin: Pua lok kue.

Amanda: that's what your dad calls your mom. LOL

Melvin: you believe I come your house slap you now bitch. Oh ya, you have no choice anyway, your mom's such an ass, Your dad has mistress. So you have to follow your lousy mom foot step. - - lol, I Starting to laugh. no kidding.

Amanda: My dad's mistress is your mom. That's why she gave birth to you. My dad fuck your mother.

FACT: Don't threaten me. when you went down to find derek at mos, you stand at one corner and ask jerry to talk to derek for you after you " Don't xia lan with me hor" kup, derek's phone. HUMJI. where's your gut? too much cough syrup? Why? angry liao wanna slap me? Lose liao wanna insult my mother? You damn childish. Find something better please.

Melvin: Anyway, I want you to pay for the back bumper damage . total will be 11k including tax.

Amanda : your dad will pay for you.

FACT : lol... it's getting funny, You can see obviously, he was pissed. He couldn't win me in those arugments and obviously he's trying to find trouble but he lost. Please, you still owe jon 230 for spoiling his suspension. You lousy driver. bTW, i saw your porsche on sgcarmart, 550 SPYder sia. Imgaine the owner bought it and realise that there are so many damage, front, side , back , rims , engine,,, etc,, WOO.

Melvin : NEvermind :) don't pay right?? maybe should see you in court someday :)

Amanda: that's what my dad says to your mom after he ditch her. (for being a lousy mistress i guess. no link thou)

FACT ; PROVE? lol. You lousy lah fatty. When I've feelings for you, all this shits hurt me but not now... instead i find it rather thrilling and funny everytime i wait for your reply. I want more. LOL. picturing your face, getting pissed ' amanda is a por look kueh.. rghh" LOL. Why are you being so affected why me? you still like me? awwww......

you claim that you wanan be with me then start doing nonsense to me and derek trying to rbeak up up. Fancy you go telling him that i'll be with you but you just gonna patch with me then bed me a few times then ditch me. Com'on, you dont even know what's a g spot/ clitories and u wanan bed me? try raping your mother. Hypocrite. I have dignity. You? Think got money all the chio bu come find you, please lah., you don't even scrape your tongue now, you have seriously body odour, attract flies lah.

Honestly i don't feel sorry at all for insulting you I think u deserve it because that's all you can do. Your mouth stink You only know how to made up stories and say people. Degrade people , insult them. No wonder elise warn me about you. EVeryone warn me about you. Look at you. people take a step back, you step on their head. somemore so fat, you squash them and they get pissed so when they get you back, u cry for your dad. i didn't say anythinga bout you.

even if i did, that was because you started on me, evenwhen we're together, you call me slut behind me you cheapo. think i don't know. break me and derek up. spread things about me. hey, ever since we settle our things at cine, i have stop talking abou you even thou i know you being hypocrite behind me. telling me u can do so much better than derek. NAH, you shit

Get real, i wasn't trying to be mean, i m still nice afterall. I kept myself cool till you push your limit, since you wanna play, let's play.

Derek : Eh meng chan just called me. He say his father damn angry at the way you scold him. He say his dad dunno what go find you or your parents. Z. then i say you go scold her mother first. Then he say he didn't scold until so jialat.

Fact: Melvin, wake up and get real, stop wanking to your porn videos and cumming on all over your pillows. nobody gives a shit who's worst. you started me first. 1st time? i kept myself cool. 2nd time, i kept myself cool, 3 rd, FUCK YOU LAH BU BOR KIA think i nice to get push around? you think i your father huh, don't let you win, start cursing him give lorry bang. u wait long long.

SEE I TOLD you guys, he's daddy's little boy.... he can't live without his father. NOW, even thou losing out reasoning with me, he calls his father up. LOL. i m a girl, i should be the one but i guess, you're the sissy one. Stop finding trouble. you will always lose in the end. Childish boy.

don't be stupid lah, you think everyone is as stupid as you? ''A***** H* L* L*** is a por lok lueh" on msn means people dunno is me? then when comes to reasoning, you can say it's not me? i think you have too much cheap drugs which turns you stupid, Nobody play such tactics. Play straight like me

Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang Meng Chan is daddy's little girl.
Melvin Chiang na bei chan is daddy's little girl.

you bloody drug addict. spoilt brat. buy branded stuff but dunno't how to wear the right way, btw, your blazer way too tight ad short for you. you can't even tie a tie you stupid. Noob fatty. please, get a life or ask your dad to buy you one.

pS. I CAN'T STOP GIGGLING. LOL

2007-09-17T08:13:00.000+08:00

Melvin : Hey whore , heard you go around telling people that you went with me so you can get free trips to japan hong kong all eh, good job.

Me :i've never say such things. and eversince we stop contact, i have not spoken anything about you.

FACT : Get real, Before i got together with you, how would i know your dad wants me to go overseas with you? Basically he was the one who insist me on going and you're the one who wanted the hong kong trip, not me.

Melvin : You and your mom really have the same genes. Cheap cunning and worthless.

Amanda: i didn't say anything. That's all i can say now.

Fact : You're insulting me and I m still keeping my cool. Don't push your luck fatty.

Melvin : Then why Jun hong all those people know. You got a high reputation as a whore already now still want start this.

Amanda : derek spoke to jun hong. jun hong says that he hasn't spoke to you for 2 years. Are you kidding me or something?

FACT : It;s not the first time where he use someone's name as a scapegoat. He used HENRY, he used SHAUN , he used CHRIST. high reputation? What u mean? Can fight with you not? leat i don't buy friends using money, i don't talk big , I don't seek attention. LOL. Attention seekers.
" Eh, you know how many cars i got???? " "I race with 30 subarus, they alll went missing when i turned." "My porsche 300 horsepower won a 400 horsepower -dunno what car- which apears on hotstuff. U SAW THAT?!" Right, even ah Dog was laughing at you when he saw you losing to tht car.

Melvin: People spreading around . Please stop being so cheap and i might drive pass geylang and see you working there someday.

Amanda; Sigh, you just can't stop boosting your ego, trying to encourage yourself everytime yo get exposed. Have fun loser. I bet he's laughing at the stories you made up after being exposed. Bomb.

FACT: i didn't know i was so famous despite my low profile image for the pass few years. How to be cheap? you k now i think i worth more than you? yon're absoutely nothing without your father.'s wealth and money. i've education and true friends - BTW, i don't buy them-
. You? Nothing.

Melvin: a loser is better than being a whore who sleep with guys for money, even my dad knows you as tanjong rhu blowjob no.1.

amanda : WAH, i bet your dad went there often, That's how he got to know your mom. Woots.

FACT: why tanjong rhu? hey, issit that whore is the only word u can use against me? LOL desn't other words fit ME? FACT, there isn't because, i dont talk big, i don't show off, i m NOT A HYPOCRITE NOR A LIAR. I DON'T MADE UP STORIES TO BOOST MY SELF ESTEEM , I DON'T DO THINGS WIHTOUT A REASON, I DON'T GO AROUND INSULTING PEOPLE TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER, I DON'T GO AROUND TELLING MY FRIENDS TO DO THINGS FOR ME AND LASTLY, I DON'T HAVE BODY ODOUR. You got a funny dad. I tanjong rhu blowjob no.1 , I WISH.. LOL , then derek gonna be the most fortunate guy!

Let's say 'I number 1 blow job in tanjong rhu, your mother number 2 - that's why your dad is so in love with her but he still can't get me! - your aunt number 3 that's why your uncle have her so what now, your dad jealous? awww.. orh luh orh luh... "

Melvin: That's why your mom is stupid. Wit, A shit useless daughter like you. Go work ktv. All show off my car telling people it's your. poor ass.

Fact: My mum was quite intelligent to tell that you're "bombing" stories to her and she actually find it annoying. LOL ( see the way she complains to derek , damn funny) I don't reply on others basically except for y dad for financial wise. In future, I can work myself. you? no education. If your dad doesn't exist, you have nothing. Get it? you play drugs, YOU PLAY CHEAP DRUGS LIKE COUGH SYRUP. oh yeah, about your car, i've never told anyone it's mine. please, I DON'T BEHAVE LIKE YOU. STOP MAKING ME SOUND LIKE YOU. (lucky you can't make me smell like you, eew) i m not like you " Aiya, that lumbo used to be mine but i crash it on the first day when i got my license. Nobody knows. (REALLY? *AMAZED*)

Melvin: Pua lok kue.

Amanda: that's what your dad calls your mom. LOL

Melvin: you believe I come your house slap you now bitch. Oh ya, you have no choice anyway, your mom's such an ass, Your dad has mistress. So you have to follow your lousy mom foot step. - - lol, I Starting to laugh. no kidding.

Amanda: My dad's mistress is your mom. That's why she gave birth to you. My dad fuck your mother.

FACT: Don't threaten me. when you went down to find derek at mos, you stand at one corner and ask jerry to talk to derek for you after you " Don't xia lan with me hor" kup, derek's phone. HUMJI. where's your gut? too much cough syrup? Why? angry liao wanna slap me? Lose liao wanna insult my mother? You damn childish. Find something better please.

Melvin: Anyway, I want you to pay for the back bumper damage . total will be 11k including tax.

Amanda : your dad will pay for you.

FACT : lol... it's getting funny, You can see obviously, he was pissed. He couldn't win me in those arugments and obviously he's trying to find trouble but he lost. Please, you still owe jon 230 for spoiling his suspension. You lousy driver. bTW, i saw your porsche on sgcarmart, 550 SPYder sia. Imgaine the owner bought it and realise that there are so many damage, front, side , back , rims , engine,,, etc,, WOO.

Melvin : NEvermind :) don't pay right?? maybe should see you in court someday :)

Amanda: that's what my dad says to your mom after he ditch her. (for being a lousy mistress i guess. no link thou)

FACT ; PROVE? lol. You lousy lah fatty. When I've feelings for you, all this shits hurt me but not now... instead i find it rather thrilling and funny everytime i wait for your reply. I want more. LOL. picturing your face, getting pissed ' amanda is a por look kueh.. rghh" LOL. Why are you being so affected why me? you still like me? awwww......

you claim that you wanan be with me then start doing nonsense to me and derek trying to rbeak up up. Fancy you go telling him that i'll be with you but you just gonna patch with me then bed me a few times then ditch me. Com'on, you dont even know what's a g spot/ clitories and u wanan bed me? try raping your mother. Hypocrite. I have dignity. You? Think got money all the chio bu come find you, please lah., you don't even scrape your tongue now, you have seriously body odour, attract flies lah.

Get real, i wasn't trying to be mean, i m still nice afterall. I kept myself cool till you push your limit, since you wanna play, let's play.

Derek : Eh meng chan just called me. He say his father damn angry at the way you scold him. He say his dad dunno what go find you or your parents. Z. then i say you go scold her mother first. Then he say he didn't scold until so jialat.

Fact: Melvin, wake up and get real, stop wanking to your porn videos and cumming on all over your pillows. nobody gives a shit who's worst. you started me first. 1st time? i kept myself cool. 2nd time, i kept myself cool, 3 rd, FUCK YOU LAH CHEEBYE, think i nice to get push around? you think i your father huh, don't let you win, start cursing him give lorry bang. u wait long long.

SEE I TOLD you guys, he's daddy's little boy.... he can't live without his father. NOW, even thou losing out reasoning with me, he calls his father up. LOL. i m a girl, i should be the one but i guess, you're the sissy one.

don't be stupid lah, you think everyone is as stupid as you? ''A***** H* L* L*** is a por lok lueh" on msn mean people dunno is me? then when comes to reasoning, you can say it's not me? i think you have too much cheap drugs which turns you stupid, Nobody play such tactics. Play straight like me

Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.
Melvin is daddy's little girl.

pS. I CAN'T STOP GIGGLING. LOL

2007-08-02T23:43:00.001+08:00

http://sg.auctions.yahoo.com/booth/maggielittlegirl

peeps, currently selling TONS of clothes. I have more than 2 luggage of clothes up for selling. Price negotiable.

Currently my camera is spoilt and I don't really have the time to to post up so many clothes so peeps who are interested, you can pop by my house to view the clothes. ^^ Or probably anything on mind, let me know, i could dig out my closet. LOL. PLEASE, don't di siao... Really tired of that. Appreciated. =)

2007-08-02T20:32:00.000+08:00

This week is the week of pain!..

Monday and Tuesday, Approximately spent $105 for full body check up.

Yesterday, $530 for Laser .

Tomorrow gonna be $630 excluding GST for Gadarsil Vaccine.

The laser was fun, I thought that the doctor puts me to sleep for 1 hour for my low tolerance sake but instead, he had only 30 Min's which I've no idea but realized that if that so, I'll experience vomiting. But the part where he insert the needle to my vein and let the drug flow in slowly, I could feel it coming from my left hand then up to my shoulder and head in a fast rate, first 2 seconds experience the shiokness,3rd second, POOF, gone.

then i woke up crying in pain, thought i couldn't really remember why i cried but I remember the pain was like doing outline of a tattoo. The best part was, I don't know how I regain my conscious, all i now was, I was crying. LOL. Properly because that I just broke up with my bf before i went into the surgery room, I THINK. LOL

I DON'T REMEMBER A SHIT!

I can feel the nurse holding me tight until the doctor complete. After they bandage, I sit up, feeling high... Then I couldn't really stand straight, but i could walk, because i was so sleepy and enjoying the highness, I decided to fully lean against the nurse to the room then sleep. LOL

i remembered i called yannie, i was #$@%#$^36456 to her. LOL That time when i called her was when i just lied on the bed feeling extremely shiok. I can't remember what i said to her. Derek and ivan then came down. YAY... and I could remember Ivan was laughing , ass.

Now there's blister growing on my back and it hurts like shit. 2 more months going for another laser treatment, This time Im gonna request for an hour. WEEE.......

For the Vaccine, It's a must that you girls have one. to prevent HPV that causes Cervical cancer. Should go DSC for pap smear which only cause $10. It's really advisable that you girls get yourself vaccinated. it may be expensive but worth a life there.

630 for 3 dosage. Take in the 1st month, 2ND month and lastly the 6Th month.

BTW, HPV is not curable, some people doesn't even have symptoms at all.

SCHOOL STARTING IN 13TH OF AUG.

2007-07-25T06:58:00.000+08:00

my dream car.
can't let you go. YOU'RE MINE ASSHOLE.
yeah. after a night of sports.
POOWF! GONE!

school starting in 2 weeks time, no time to party anymore. ANYWAY, i have finally majored in sculpture. WEE. ok. that's all. bye.

2007-07-20T04:36:00.000+08:00

http://findfelicia.blogspot.com/

Help, school mate is missing. have you seen her?

2007-07-19T05:45:00.001+08:00

OK NO MORE PHOENIX. DECIDED TO GO LASER. :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

2007-07-17T06:54:00.001+08:00

I have this thing for guys in uniform. They just turn me on. :D

2007-07-17T06:47:00.000+08:00

being spending time with my baby . He's in camp now and started his driving course so yeah, won't be booking out for 5 days. :(

i m one fucking happy girl. Hee.

Ill be getting a new tattoo soon. When to get out friend's shop with ivan and decided to get a full back phoenix going down to the thigh. NO WORRIES, NOT THOSE AH LIAN KIND. I am freaking happy. I hate those eyes behind my back. GEEZ. It's gonna be a very feminie one with bright colours and flowers. WISH ME LUCK! And pray that my dad gets me a car. I want a fcking fairlady. SCREAMS.

won't be blogging that often till i get my camera. I NEED A NEW CAMERA. fck sony.

2007-07-11T07:42:00.000+08:00

FREAKING sad. Now sony called and claimed that my camera's circuit box screwed up, in order to change a new one, it's gonna cost $370, I bought the camera like 700? cb....

I wanna get those small camera meant for photography usage. Anyone has any suggestion or opinion? I want a new camera. :(

2007-07-07T08:29:00.001+08:00

AHHH cranky, just send my camera to fix few days back. Received a call that there's gonna be charges of $120 to fix it. i hate sony cameras.

2007-07-04T13:43:00.001+08:00

Camera sent to servicing. $80 bucks, not including spare part. Damn it.

2007-07-04T08:49:00.000+08:00

been hanging out with Derek Ivan Rayner Baey lately. It's fun that you get to keep yourself occupied.

Speaking of slimming pills, I have been really trying to tone up and slim down badly. I have really flabby arms and thighs. About the slimming pills, it's not basically good esp the side effects, You will feel extremely dehydrated and you can't sleep. Insomia. Heart beat increase rapidly and you will feel shag ironic but hyper active at the same time which also prone to anger easily. You won't feel like eating for 2 days so it's advisable to take it once in the morning alternate days. But of cause, have lots fruits and veggies, need to go gym too.

OK LAH... i grew fat and I felt pretty affected by it so been working hard on my body. Swimming, gym, Jogging, Pills, fruits Salad, Lotsa water, no more snacks. :( 1 more month!

2007-06-26T13:11:00.000+08:00

I found $2 behind my monitor!

2007-06-26T04:19:00.000+08:00

I'm pon, you're zi jerkass. :(

2007-06-25T18:24:00.001+08:00

Please, stop being so thick skin.
So what if you're rich and you've money? YOU'RE A HYPOCRITE.

All you give is things that I wanted but not the love I've been telling you about. Whenever I m angry, but you things to cheer me up but then again, your pattern come out. What's the point? Compromising doesn't even work on you. All you have is money and excuses. I m always faithful but you go around telling people I m a slut . You listen to people's stories and then realised that it's untrue after how you agree with them how fucking lok I was, you start giving excuses to cover yourself.

In japan, the fortune paper was right about me. I shouldn't stay for money when there's no love. shouldn't even let my repputation down. you've been ruining my reputation just to boost yours up but look, i don't think anyone really believes your stupid stories; if they know you better, the more they even won't believe.

I never gonna go back to you again. It's either now I get hurt or later I'll get hurt ; I choose now.

Who dua most, everyone should know alright? No point saying how pissed off you're when you tried to make time for me , i dua. 50 times meeting, you only tried to make time for me twice, the rest all dua.

I've been making time for you throughout the whole relationship but you have been playing me out you motherfucker. To think you have the cheek go telling people I dua you? CB, you think u president huh? knn. You people you big fuck? people dua you, you BHB , act dulan. KNN. ccb, you buay paiseh huh. cB, make me use vaglurites then you song huh? sbb. Don't thick skin lah. Please. I m sick of your nonsensical stories. It's inane. asshole.

you don't need to act emotional and hao lian to gain sympathy from other you cb. I give you treat like shit and now still want to thick skin by telling stories? knn. you go kindergarden tell stories lah. only stupid kids will believe your stories. CCB.. see bay dulan. cb mouth with cb logic. ccb

ccb, today onwards you can happily go create stories about me lah fucking , you fucking childish shit. because i won't wanna waste my energy giving a damn about you.You're just a immature kid trying to waste my time here. And please, don't try threatening, I m scared. :(

ok, you can fuck off you jerk. I hate you.

YOU'RE SUCH A HYPOCRITE

2007-06-25T18:14:00.000+08:00

Hello melvin, i would really appreciate that if you could STOP GOING AROUND EXAGGERATING STORIES ABOUT ME TO BOOST YOUR WEAKLING EGO. For example, i haven't call your dad for months so please , or probably he's just lying to you something, stop telling people i called him and cried to beg you back. look at yourself, do you think i'll beg for you back? I mean if by spreading this, will make you feel better for your ego, then sigh, go bah... i'll just spend my time letting people read this post.

People are already laughing at you . i wonder why do you wanna make it worst. But anyway, the break up, wasn't a revenge. you initate it by sending me a message says better of single and take care . But it wasn't me who reply to you. HEE. not my fault but well, since EVERYONE feels that the behind the message is obvious stated you wanted me to beg you back.... like ALL THE MESSAGES YOU WROTE TO ME IN THE PAST, i just can't be bothered. And if you tell people i m irritating, COM'ON, everyone withness the night you broke up with me, you keep calling me and sending stupid messages when w all are playing games.

There's no revenge at all. stop trying to act emotional... oh, if you wanna do more prank calls on me, go ahead. What lok kueh lah.

Childish. I m better off with my happy single life. You know, this is what happened when you hurt someone too much and when that person gets really strong, that's it. You're gone. You no longer existed.

Thanks to derek baey ivan and everyone for helping me to stand up and be stronger.

2007-06-25T04:07:00.001+08:00

Thanks mel
first time i ever fetch derek on time. HE POP!!!
Vanilla ice cream with coke. DOPE

i love billy bombers
thanks baey!

He's a good cook. i think
blahahahha!

hee

Derek : "shit, i can't go any higher'

Done by baey
starting the fire

ivans' hungry. :(

candid shot, supposingly.
idiot

that's not a flower bud, it's the melted marshmellow which i shoot. CUTE RIGHT?
damn xia lan
ALL DOWN!
DURIAN!!!!! i love durians but it make me sick. :(

shag
i love CYCLING!

hate the sun.
thanks to derek

saw the kid that fell behind derek? LOL

the 50 roses he sent on our 4th anniversary

Derek
Melvin. LOL
Jerry. LOLOLOL

the lobster is good
this steak is don't know what they call the diamond cut. IT'S HUGE. $94

couldn't finish but thanks melvin. it was a great dinner. He spent $340 for treating us. :D

The surprise he gave me but wrong size. no stock liao. ;(

2007-06-18T21:22:00.001+08:00

Thanks to my baby brother derek. PULLING ME AROUND WITH THE SKATES ON AND YES, HE BRAKED WHILE I WAS SPINNING AROUND TILL I FELL ON MY KNEE AND I LAY FLAT ON THE ICE. FUCK YOU BROTHER. :(

MADDNESS

this is what happened when someone keeps whining about not able getting high and neglect advices against zouk's long island tea. trust me, THE LONG ISLAND TEA THERE IS SUICIDE.

after cafe delmar

n th

after cafe delmar

2 weeks back zouk

2007-06-18T05:55:00.000+08:00

just came back after meeting up with my neighbour. He said he saw melvin driving audi at ubi 1 week ago but i recalled that he alreayd lost his license.

Bah, then suddenly memories of us flashes back at me. When i came back, i look at our babies, thought of the first time, i feel so bored, he bought a guinea pig for me to cheer me up and keep myself occupied whenever he goes out. Vanillia was a baby back then cute and small ad i always put it on the bed with me and watch together when he goes out. Then later get chocolate as a mating buddy for her. hehe.

Seriously man, i can't get over him, it's really tough, i haven't been in a r/s like this . It's like, honeymoon trips. Staying with him24/7. we do almost everything together. Foam bathe, coooking, waking each other up, kicking each other in the morning, kissing with morning breathe, ikea shopping for room, in kimono costume, teasing each other on the plane, sat some stupid scary rides in japan , holding hands whereever we go, farting at each other's face (LOL?????) go food hunting in the middle of the night.

You know, i wanted all these back again but like everyone said, if you get back in a broken r/s, everything will be different morever, melvin is really happy with his life now without me. He's really working very hard and in future, he will even find a better girl whom wouuld be able to love him more than i do. ok, i m really tearing now. this is really stupid. i m just confused. i really love him... i really love.. i really love him........ and i never have the intention of harming or hurting him. i really love him.

wee

2007-06-17T20:49:00.003+08:00

i only love this the beeest

best lip balm. Get the coco butter one, smells like chocoalate and the black one is very moisturing, minty feel, got it from japan.

ok, i not photogenic. :(

best facial wash ever. BEST. cleansing oil which remove every trace of make up on you and the washing powder, not drying for the skin but really clean.
i miss shaun's cooking.

sean being stripped off naked in dxo
he's always sleepy.
before zouk
ok, i m not photogenic. ;(

love the 3 of them

2007-06-17T20:10:00.000+08:00

few days back was me and mel's supposing 4th ann. stayed up till 10am thought that I could see him but instead, he delivered 50 roses. It's exactly how i wanted it to be. Sweet, but too bad that we could never pass our 4th anniversary. sigh, tearing as i typed that sentence out. ok stupid thou.

Thanks to Derek, Ivan, Baey, who has been there for me all the time when i was really down the past week. Their words and company has put me through all the pain i was getting. esp the day where mel supposed to meet me but then he went to meet his friends in cineleisure instead on the last day before he flew to dubai. that's when i really hate him.

Took advice from them. Yeah, i m only young once and i'll live to it. i won't fucked up my teenage life anymore. I won't let anyone bring my any of my days down anymore.

The words they all said are enough for me to let go of mel. Like, if he loves you, why wouldn't he meet you? what's makes you go back to him after how you've been treated with ignorance? He's always fuck care these and that.. would he bother about you? As older he grew, he will be crowded with girls, can you take it? why does he even hide things for you? etc etc...

AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
you're a big girl already. dont keep thinking of living supported life
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
you've gotta depend on yourself
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
what if one day you're with him and he decides to run away
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
who will be in trouble
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
its you

AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
i tell you ar
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
you dont patch back with him arr
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
you patch back with him
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
i think youll make alot of ur friends angry
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
like me
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
i'll hate you
AbCigerattesDisappointmenteFuckGamblehijkLoveMoneyNSORDPrivateqrSEXtuvwxyz says:
i wont talk to you ever againn

"its just a matter of time before he finds another one more fine"

had fever and really bad cough and sorethroat, everday been meeting up with ivan and derek, FUN! ivan just left for aust, ahhh... gonna miss his craps. He's an cheerful ass and i wanna be like him. watch movies, fantastic 4 and ocean 13, DOPESHIT.

Felix and rap have been nagging me hard to drink more water , so sweet of them. jon has been telling me experience of players, rich people. He used to be a player too but finally he settle down with his really cute gf .

ok. Ytd was fun. Had a hair cut, look like shit but it's ok, new image. went ice skating with brother baey and rayner. DEREk MADE ME FELL AND THERE'S A HUGE BRUISE ON MY LEFT KNEE CAP. SCREAMS. night head down to zouk additional marcus, the ass who burn my hand. met up with joshua, so cute and derek's friends , the other group of friends were dancing with fat chicks. WAH LAU!.... i must grow fatter than. LOL. all guys surrounding the fat chicks. :( i feel sad. DAMN IT.

Ok i m happy, can have my closet removed and made a new bigger closet for more storage. i m happy. :D

2007-06-11T18:25:00.000+08:00

Photos continue later. I woke up praying that he'd call from dubai but nah... i was stupid

snacks

lazy ass

YAY!

hubbie dun want hug me. NB

krispy kreme!!!!

sasa, EVERYWHERE!

dear bought his dress for me. :( $150. bUT NICEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

the hot lemon tea, rocks

kiss me kiss me!

wtf u want.

our fav cravings

my lazy boy, always yawning.

sleepy

always tickling my leg. -.-

2007-06-11T17:22:00.000+08:00

dog and bie

it's like a pathway to heaven

lazy ass
l

slacking. damn cold

got tv!
tis beer is dope

i was bored.
hee

he bought this for me to say sorry after the fight. sigh
i dunno is this real but theres no lv box with it. so yeah. bought in singapore the day before we fly to japan

i like the toilet111

police station

can u see godzilla?

we fought right after these shots

knn, this one, you see the slope down on the right, FUCKING HELL, my heart almost stop

tired day
shopping!

i like the way you sleep.

one biscuit, all come.

the dunno what god nosetril. go throught it will heng heng

The wish area. Buy one of the wood planks and write your wish on it then hang it there,
sweet.. :(

the healing god. you where pain touch him,

they are from taiwan, dunno why but they all were crying was praying.

the udon, DOPE

he caught this for in from the arcade machine awww... i lov ehim
lazy ass

2007-06-10T20:34:00.000+08:00

went to cafe de ma with derek and friends. FUCkING FUN. The atmosphere there is so perfect for couples. you know when i see coupls lying on the bed watching the stars, hugging to keep each other warm, wine , kissing ; melvin has never brought me to such places before, neither has he ever thought of doing such things. It's like , this is what i really wanna do with him. These are the times which i really wanna spend with him. Its just me and him for that moment, nothing else.

2007-06-09T06:13:00.000+08:00

today was a FUN NIGHT. party from 9pm till 5 am, DOPE!

was partying with derek, baey, mucus(marcus) and mostly his friends. FUCK, it's damn funny when you see derek and friends di siao people. WaHAHHAAHHA. We can even laugh at nothing, ok, no reason and that stupid mucus burned my hand with cig, accidently thou but i m now looking at the blister with temptation to BURST IT. ok. I WONT.

but right till the end when i got home, i msg him, yeah yeah, i said i wont but i was really on the verge of crying. Bascially he's flying to dubai tml for business trip , my dad told me that it's gonna be a long trip so i reminded him to EAT inside the plane. He tend to sleep all the way withohut eating and it's like so bad for his stomach. must wake up eat already then continue sleep, at least much shiok. LOL and that he has to drink lots water and have to applied lip balm. He's got really very dry lips and i always tend to apply lip balm for him before he sleep. Air con room always dry up his lip's moisture.

Although he hates the layer of balm feeling for I always apply for him or either wait till he fall asleep. LOL.

And when i saw what leoiee said, i feel that, probably, its was just me. I mean, all my r/s are screwed up, probably i was just too serious. oh boy, i can't help it. I just want someone to love me the right way, probably i was asking for too much? like a simple outing? or a proper dinner? sweet foam bathe? more responsible? more attention? less being spite?

i don't know. i guess i can't have a r/s for nuts.

it's a long night.

2007-06-08T06:17:00.000+08:00

to ben or his gf, i sincerely apologized for using your photo. It's just out of harshness. It won't happen again. I m really sorry if this really cause some big misunderstanding.

to his gf, I m really sorry. Really very sorry.

wait for you

2007-06-08T06:16:00.001+08:00

.

2007-06-08T05:41:00.001+08:00

2007-06-08T04:10:00.000+08:00

Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
he still thinks u cheated on him
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i just told him he's a fucking 2 face bastard
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
and all these months i help him for fuck.
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i don't derserve this treatement from a friend like him
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
and neither should you
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
u hear me
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
enough is enough babe.

Amanda says:
you believe that i cheated on him?
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
whether or not u can let go
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
u better
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i told mel
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
u should know amanda better then i do
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
and obviously amanda isn't that kinda girl
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i know that babe
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i know u didn't
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
he's repuation is going to fucking get so screwed up
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
nobody wants to hire a loser like him
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
who probably screwed up his o levels and not even studying
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
end up faking meetings

Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
it's stupid
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
everytime he tries to cut me
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i'll cut him back
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
and i just hung up
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
i can't stand a man with so much ego and explanations
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
sometimes, with him shutting his golden mouth will solve anything
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
but no,
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
he's fucking disgusting pimpled face mouth just has to open.
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
don't u ever dare get back with him anymore
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
this is the last time i'm telling you this
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
don't u ever fucking dare get back with him
Cordelia - my day couldn't get any better. says:
unless u want to fucking cry everyday like how u are right now.

I like it when she gets really anrgy cause she sounded really sweet. :)

thanks corde, i'll keep my promise this time.

I don't know but yes, probably due to the past of the way i work in pubs and how i had trouble and ppl make up stories about me, to make it even more interesting, they add in even more. People who hates me keeps spreading. Reason? no idea. probably fucked up attitude toward people whom i really don't wanna befriend with because trust was not there. i only hang out with people when i feel trust is there. you can express everything out rather than keepipng this or that and the best part is, they will be there always.

Maybe because i have friends and mostly are guys. Honestly, TRUE FEELINGS. I feel easier talking to opposite parties. I used to have alot of girl friends, basically, some love bitching around, some tend to get jealous of you FOR no reasons , some, i feel weird with them because they tend to act like gentle, you know, ACT, they are not even themselve. and another reason is, i m pretty low self esteem, when i have bad hair day i wont feel like going out . i feel sad. So when i meet pretty girls i tend to get shy, the worst part is if they aren't themselve, like the "ACTING" girls, i feel even more worst because i don't feel comfortable with them. and esp when they are attached, gone case.

That's why you see, i only hang out with yannie joa corde cooper, all the usual people. Ray derek clinton. you see all these years, i only hang out with these people because i seen them as true friends. These people are the only ones who see the true side of me. who understands me and treasure me. These are the only people whom i cann rely my happines on because they will never disappoint me.

Friendster, not much girls added me, it's just guys. Probably because i dun tend to talk to girls that much but used to the habit of talking to guys better, it may seems like an excuse but to me it's not, At least guys, they show more attention to you rather than girls. For what intention they have, i don't know but i know how to protect myself.

aiya, i dunno what to say what, fuck, i m sick of explaining shits to everyone. I m sick of explaining things to clear myself just because some motherfuckers screwed up how people think of me.

i don't know how you people think or feel but, i have already proven myself that, i was serious about this r/s. that's all.

2007-06-08T03:34:00.000+08:00

why did i leave you in the first place - because u treated me like shit. You ever treasure me. u didn't even say thanks then i pack your lagguage. You never even apprecaited anything about me. iNSTEAD OF ASKING ME TO GO JAPAN WITH YOU, YOU MSG YOUR COUSIN, KIKI telling her you wanna go japan with her only. Paying for her tickets. How would i feel?

In the airport, you walk around, fuck care me when i was sleeping alone at the waiting area, were you even there to hold me? it's cold. i'ts really very cold.

Then before we boarded on the plane, the security stop us because they found lighter inside our bags . you took out your lighter, And then u boarded the plane, leaving me alone doing the packing and unpacking. I bursted out in tears infront of everyone... Margert was asking me, "how come he never accompany you??"

You kept saying that i was with benji, YES, i put up his photos to piss you off. I have my childish side too. WHY? BECAUSE YOU WROTE IN YOUR FRIENDSTER FIRST, YOU WANT HUI LING BACK, 2ND, YOU TELL ME TO STOP CAL LING U CAUSE YOUR GF WILL BE JEALOUS, THIRD, YOU WENT TO TELL CORDE THAT YOU WANT TO PACK BACK W ITH YOUR EX.

So i put up his photos.

When i explain to you, you're the one started it, you kept saying because i was with benji. GET STRAIGHT TO THE POINT, I STARTING PUTTING UP HIS PHOTOS WHEN YOU TOLD CORDE YOU WANNA PATCH WTIH YOUR EX.

ONE LAST THING, WHAT HAVE I FUCKING DONE WRONG TO YOU? I SHITTED YOU LIKE SHIT WHEN WE WERE DATING BECAUSE I DON'T FUCKING LIKE YOU. YOU'RE DIRTY. YOU DON'T SHOWER WHEN YOU MEET ME. YOU STINK THE WHOLE FUCKING CAR WITH YOUR BODY ODOUR. YOUR HAIR IS SUPER OILY AND DISGUSTING. THE REASON WHY I MEET YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE SINCEREAND YOU HAVE MONEY BUT I CANT STAND YOU.

but on 14th feb itself, it's a different thing. yes it's fast but because when i agreed, i recalled all the sincere things you did for me. The way you cried, i decided to treat you the right way.

I moved in to the 22nd floor, you went missing, i went up and down searching for you. i was having a project on and deadline was just days ahead, i neglect and keep walking up and down to the car park to see whther you'r home. keep going to your house and ring the bell. Calling derek weeping that i couldn't find you. but what happened after that? when i ring the bell for the last time , your aunt opened the door and i realised that you were sleeping.

you said that you will buy foo for me, i waited from evening till midnight , you disappeared, i couldn't take it, u just keep disappearing, i cried in the room, you know but you didn't bother much, you just left the food there and go home sleep.

you know, all you can do is to gek me..

finally we got back, you work, ok. gooD. you work from afternoon till midnight. ytd say wan meet me, in the end, dua me the whole day.

Today say want meet, 3pm meet, in the end say 8pm meet then 10.45 then you disappeared till 12am+.

I M NOT SAYING YOU CAN'T WORK, YOU CAN, YES I ENCOURAGED YOU BUT THE POINT IS THAT, YOU NOT SHOWIG ANY LOVE FOR ME. YOU SAID YOU WANAN MEET ME FOR DINNER BUY ME DINNER, YOU DIDN'T EVEN BRING ANY FOOD BACK. THE WHOLE POINT IS IF YOU CARE, WOULD YOU BEAR TO LET ME GO HUNGRY? YOU'RE FUCKING DIFFERENT. YU CAME HERE, ALL YOU CAN DO IS SLEEP. ALL I WANTED TO DO IS YOU TO LOVE ME. I M DOING EVERYTHING TO SEEK YOUR ATTENTION, SEEK YOUR CARE, YOU DON'T BOTHER. I PROVE SO MUCH , ALL YOU CAN SAY IS, "NO WONDER EVERYBODY SAYS THAT YOU'RE A SLUT, WHEN I NO MONEY, NO CAR YOU LEAVE ME."

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO TO PROVE THESE AREN'T TRUE? DO YOU REALLY WANT ME TO LIT MY WRIST INFRONT OF YOU TO SHOW THAT I REALLY LOVE YOU AND THESE FACTS FROM YOUR FUCKING FRIENDS ARE NOT TRUE?

NOW YOU JUST KEEP SHOWING PPL HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE. TELLING PPL WAH, YOU GOT SO MANY CARDS, ONE MONTH CAN SIGN 30 K. BIG FUCK.

GO AHEAD AND SAY THINGS WHICH HURT ME BECAUSE I SEEN YOUR TRUE COLOUS YOU'RE JUST TOO ARRAGONT. YOU JUST CAN'T STOP SHOWING OFF YOUR MONEY TO BUY FRIENDS. SO WHAT IF ONE DAY YOU RISE UP TO BE THE MOST RICH PERSON ON EARTH?

you can never buy everything.

I finally seen what kind of person you are. You just keep smiling w hen i tried to talk things out with you just now. you can even smile when i was tearing. you just keep smiling when i was trying to tell you how much i did for you.

i finally feel regretted loving you. I finally see the true you. you're just too self centered and egolistic.

i don't know what shit you have been telling kiki about me. probably tht's why she hates me. i don't know what hit have you been telling everyone. thanks for screwing up my reputation. but at least it doesn't matters now cause i have true friends. Friends who won't make me cry but instead, always there for me. you have none. you have to pay for their cab so that they can come down accompany you.

FUCK YOU MELVIN. I'LL PROVE TO YOU I CAN BE HAPPIER WITHOUT YOU OR YOUR STUPID MELVIN. LASTLY, YOU SUCK IN MAKING UP STORIES AND EVERYONE KNOWS THAT YOU'R A HYPOCRITE. STOP ACTING. YEAH YEAH, GO BITCH BEHIND MY BACK. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. LIKE I CARE.

goodbye. My love for you was never a lie.

2007-06-07T02:56:00.001+08:00

i made the worst decision i ever could. I choose to leave him.

I've been waiting for him the whole day, not only that he didn't turn up, he's sitll discussing about work. the whole point is, can he be trusted this time?

You know that kind of feeling whereby you hae been really pushing the r/s so hard yet on the other hand holding on, you broke loose, took a break ad got back, things seems to change a little but it just couldn't work out. You feel tired, it's hurt, you still tear with thoughts of leaving him but you couldn't take it. it hurts even more where u have to keep pushing.

i don't see a reason why I wanna leave him if he really changed to love me the right way but he hasn't... after so much we been through, he still couldn't love me the right way.

I m so sick of tearing every now and then. The same old words, you will never be able to put yoursellf in my shoes.

my holiday ends at aug, i need a job.

2007-06-07T00:10:00.000+08:00

He felt asleep right after i shower finish. Had instant noodles again with tv mute. As i watched him sleep, i teared with fear of losing again.

reason was as i picture the perfect moment, it's so perfect that I can't lose him again. I was paranoid because times in the past, the perfect moment never last for days.

I hug him and I cried , YEAH, i wet his shirt and its digusting.

I don't know how to continue from there, ok. then later he went to court early in the morning, his licnese is suspended for 6 months. :)

Then i waited for him since early afternoon, i didnt call him as much as often because i feel that i should wait for his calls instead. Probably he's tired? probably he's working? probbaly he's jsut busy. I learnt to respect all his freedom.

Then slowly waited till night. -________________-

Ok, finally he called. PRETTY LONG THOU but he called... :D

And now, 3 hours ago he said he would come .. now is 12+am.. Sigh. Still waiting.

He will be leaving singapore this sat to dubai for 8 days. Business trip he said. after that he will be leaving for italy for 2 weeks.

IT feels weird that, i have been sticking around with him since the start of this year and suddenly, he's gone.

ANYWAY, i will be so damn free, please ask me out.

2007-06-06T18:15:00.001+08:00

i got back together with him and i m really very happy, he cut his hair short and look like a nerd now.

He changed, yeah for the better , on the character wise but not the way he treated me. I mean, yeah be brought me panadols and cough syrup for me but i miss those times which he was really sweet towards me.

maybe i was asking for too much but i m pretty contented now but yet on the other hand, i feel that he's too good for me. contradicting here but, suddenly, i felt like i gonna lose him again.

He's leaving for italy for 2 weeks for business trip and dubai later on. By the time he's back my school had already started and we have been together amost everyday, the sudden loss of him is leaving a deep impact on me.

Argg...i dunno what's wrong.

2007-06-05T21:08:00.000+08:00

continue the rest of t he photos tml. tired siak :(

2007-06-05T19:26:00.000+08:00

HAHAHAHAH, kana aim by the deer.

japan is illed with green tea land. ALOT tea farms....

holy water again

holy water. Everyone is queuing up to drink. The water flows 24/7 yearly and it's dman cool and fresh. No kidding. ok i always not kidding. lol

The red one mean suay this year and the next 3 years. i think. LOL
Love temple.

the god that steals your future. So it's locked up. so duh

dope building. It's made up of wood planks. just wood, no screws no nothing. woods and woods.

aww...

they say this motherfucker tells you the future. WTf/ can he speak english?

varities of green tea leaves

it's mochi with chocolate

the mochi is sOFt.. really soft and the choclate inside is really sweet and smooth. melts inside your mouth.
i can't find the handcuffs!
from the vending machine
dope. hoT

bullet train. Oh oh, i will upload the video clip

my shit ass boyfriend

i wanan buy back these toilet machines. good for mastubation

At some rejected good warehouse area. There's lot of mini dogs teh re and they are treated like princess.

unisex toilet! you know that if u pee in the hole, if your pee hits the side of the toilet hole, you will see SMOKE! ok, vapours. sO COol

hubbie holding a big corn cost 600 yen. thats like 6 to 7 bucks.
ahh.... maggie wants to hong willam. lol

not kidding but seems scary to me.

2,305m high

thses stones are found near mt fuji area. There's lots inside this museum but no photo taking allowed. argh.

The crystal where u make your wish and clap twice then you molest it.

i look so pregnant

we were laughing because he showed his legs to us. willam.

it's not candid shot. He posed. LIKE THIS is how he made us laugh while taking group photos.
still got arcade

this is the tallest roller coaster i ever seen. Trust me, it's even TALLER then what u see here. ok, i dunno how tall but it's damn tall.
the lantern, is HUGE

some weird temple

lunch
dinner
idiots who rather riot then sleeping

rioting bus
Harajuku

Billionair boy's club. DEsign damn nice.

this suck

TOKYO DISNEY

mickey ice cream sandwich!!!!
THIS SUCK! thou i was freaked out. HEE? Universal studio one rock. MUST try the T rex ride. wooo!!!!! DOPE

spotteed her crying during the disney parade. stupid

waiting for you~~~ LOL

she's craving pictures on glass
he's good.

Made of glass . A1 paper size.

stupid duck. Run damn fast

780 yen. I love the box.

taaaaaaaaaaaaa daaaaaaaaaaaa mickey jam sandwich with chips and jelly.

retarded

MICKEY BURGER!
this kid is stupid
3 more hours to go. space mountain take years to queue

Eminem Attack

kel with i forgot this guy name but he's really tall and he's only my age. From Nyp. Cute yeah. LOL

They love william
hot legs. Remember the toe nails? :D
christmas hotel!
saba, bought from some 24 horus mini mart. ROCKS

2007-06-02T00:21:00.001+08:00

if you don't mind, please return me my stuff, especially my license if not i have to report lost asap. sorry that i don 't trust you after i seen how you took all your brother's credit cards and scream at me for making you put back and return it.

2007-06-01T20:56:00.000+08:00

theo nly happiest time i had with you was our 2nd hong kong trip. Because that's the only time i could feel love from you.

or probably because you have no companion.

2007-06-01T20:22:00.000+08:00

why do you make me cry so hard for you all the time?

why do do you always calls me a slut when i was loyal and faithful to you all the time?

why do you always think i was aftering your motney and car whereby i don't mind sitting bus with you or having instant noodles for daily meals?

why do you say i always fuck around when i spent most of my time with you than my parents?

You always make me feel so low self esteem, telling me that girl or this girl is pretty. saying how faat i m or ugly. i always try to make myself pretty for you thou it's hard. buy clothes and cosmatic to make myself look good. make myself smell nice for you but all you do when you get back just sleep. And you didn't even appreciate.

The one sided love is all we had in our relationship.

Think about the amount of promises you broke.

Think about the amount of lies you layered each time when you were exposed.

Think about the words saying how much you love me.

Fancy the childish side of you shows by bitching behind my back, making another girl to prank call me.

if this is all the revenge you want it back on me for leaving you, you have it.

I left you for good.

Simply, you just think for yourself. Whatever happens, you won't listen but instead, you will push all the fault to me.

Fancy u saying I m two timing for things i've never time.

I have never let you down. You in japan, see any girl pretty, shout infront of everyone saying if she's your gf, you will be happy. I kept quiet.

you don't even allow me to talk to any of the tour mates saying they all like fucked up and you went to make friends with them.

I have never done anything to hurt you.

you were the one abusing drugs and screaming at me for no reasons infront of the whole tour group. i kept quiet.

You were the one who start hitting me and curse my parents when i simply asked if you were still on drugs but you denied knewing that's its so obvious .

I have to pack your lagguage for you. EVery morning in japan, i can't even have peace eating my breakfast, i have to rush my breakfast th en rush up to wake up you, instad of appreciating, you scolded me for waking you up. everyday for 1 week.

you don't even let me have peace walk around in japan.

whenever we go out, you just walk infront and left me all the way back.

You're the one who said u wanted hui ling back on the 2nd day of breeak up.

You're the one who said you have a gf and wants to stop contact with me on the 3rd day.

You're the one who said that you wanted to patch with your ex.

You're the one who said u wanna whack me if you see me in zouk.

You hurt me so much, all i wanted to prove by putting his photos up that I could move on. But i couldn't.

you made me quarrel with your friends by trusting their stories then later come telling me it's not true.

you called me a slut when sean called to tell you he fucked me to break us up but then realised it's not true cause he loss to you.

you promise you will work hard and stop drugs but what did you do?

You slept in the office and bought drugs home

You promise your dad you won't speed upteem times, but u crashed his car over and over again and curse him to death when he didn't give u money.

you left the guinea pigs at some deserted house for days and promise to help me bring over but you made me waited for 6 hours and then tell me to go take myself in the middle of the night.

you eat on the bed and throw the mess around, i've to clean up the shit for you.

you always don't bathe and i could smell your massive body odour i kept quiet.

you always make up stories to tell others.

you want attention, i gave you all.

you woouldn't let my contact my guys friends, i stop but yet you contact your gfs and even calls me a bitch behind me.

whenever something happen, you will push the blame to your friends, it's always not yourself.

you took 6 packs of 5 home and LSD, when spotted, you blame to jody but what i realised, it wasn't him.

during school times, i was so stress up, instead of giving me su pport, you went out.

you promise to come back at 12am but your went off till 4am

you promise to fetch me to sc hool and made me waited for 2 hours promising u will be there in 15 mins but instead, 2 hours and i failed my project.

your father and uncle has been stressing me out to keep u at home. i did but you never understand instead, you bitch behind me.

i wrote sweet pill notes for you but you never treasure it and lost it.

you bought me the necklace and tell me it's for me. yet on the other hand, you told your dad and margeret that it's for your mom and when i asked you again infront of margert, you said it's for me and you going to buy another for your mom. after the break up, you asked me back for the gifts.

take it as i lost the battle in the war.

i no longer wanna argue or reason out anything with you because whatever i say, you will go back to square 1 ; it's always never your fault.

I will remember how you hit me till i bleed and push me to the ground and shoot cig at me. I'll remember.

Go on bitching with your friends how fucked up i m. i know myself and i know you. continuing telling your friends to make prank call on me and call me slut or whatever like what you just did because I know myself.

and i have a tag here, look on your right, you can tag and play prank on it. i wouldn't mind.

I felt stupid being affected .

Right now, i'll move on. You could no longer affect me.. nor break my heart again.

you might be really angry seeing all these because i wrote out your secerts.

As for his friends who doesn't know what's going on or what i've been thru might think i m only siding myself to bring him down or whatever calling me a slut. I don't know about it.

he's a nice friend but he's never responsible enough to take up a r/s.

to that girl who prank call, it's ok. Because he told you his side of story and that like what i mentioned, he's always never at fault.

to jody, sorry for mistaken you because i trust the wrong person.

To jerry and kevin tee, thanks for always giving me a chance to speak up for myself and understands.

I guess it's karma that i didn't treasure you in the first place when we're dating. How i ignored your cries wh en i realised you're full of lies.

i love the way u never failed to celebrate our anniversary but sadly not till our 4th one.

I love the way u kiss me to sleep.

i love the way u ran out to get panadols for me and made me finish up the warm water .

i love the way you showered for me when my finger was injured badly and the whole arm hurts.

i like the silly part of you.

i like it when you were so shy u didn't dare to hug me when we are dating and you were perspiring all over.

i miss the time you always end conversation with a ' love you fats'

i miss the time i always amde u wwake up to send me to school and you can't stop rolling on the bed.

i like it when i was drunk crying, you were there hushing me.

but why did you change? why are your negatives hurting me so much ?

I always think the sweet side of you to bring myself to love you more but why are you always pushing me awway..

LASTLY, you said you have 40+ ex gfs that and all of them are damn pretty and you screwed more than half of them and now you're calling me a slut. Thats too much of you.

2007-06-01T15:08:00.003+08:00

Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
well ... i believe that since it is over try leaving it there
Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
n stop trying to hurt him back
Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
even in a war one side has to give up then it will end
Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
it might sound unfair n u lose out now
Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
but in return u get ot feel better n u get to release a burden u been holding on too long..
Benkuza: anyone with koda kumi album? says:
why not..

2007-05-31T21:45:00.000+08:00

after mural painting. all SHAG.
i only concerntrate on the bottom picture. heh?

i miss this asshole

I m so sick of blogging. :(

2007-05-17T22:33:00.000+08:00

just touched down from hongkong since sunday. Things was alright till communication broke down again. Haven't had the chance to upload things up.

Situations getting complicated. Now that he's dad wouldn't even let me out. Not even club. I ahve to stay home. I've to sleep early. This is not my life but I've no choice.

Mel doens't even understand how i fucking feel. I pack and unpack his lagguage while all he does was lie on the bed eat and watch tv. All he knew was to find money and buy me expensive stuff to cheer me up. P.S, not everything.

I miss my friends. He can meet up with his friends anytime anyday wherelse i can't. If i does, he will think that i m a slut. I miss my friends badly. This sat will be flying over to japan . sigh.

miss you guys

2007-05-08T12:29:00.000+08:00

2007-05-04T10:56:00.000+08:00

Ok.

I have tons of photos to post.

HONG KONG TRIP

CRUISE TRIP

SCHOOL times.

PROJECTS.

ME and MEL

CLOTHES!!!

I finally took photos for the clothes. WEE?! but lazy man. stuck with mel.

There had been ALOT OF drama series between me and him and some other third party stories shit tryin to break us up. WTH... Mainly things got out of hand till the point that we have to seek his dad ( his dad is one super hero, damn sak. LOL).

Now things got kinda settle down, well, the first day.

I miss my friends. I miss all my friends. I wanan hang out with them soon. And joa, THANKS LAH........ HEE?!

LAstly, kai, :)

CORDE.. LOVE YOU!

YANNIE, MEET ME!!!!

2007-04-18T12:19:00.000+08:00

guys HELP.

i have clothes to sell just to earn a little extra cash myself yet at the same time clear my closet.

erm, wait till i find my camera charger and will be able to post up here soon.

you can come to my house and for view if you want to. SUPPORT PLEASE!!! =(

clothes, bags probably shoes? SOB!!

2007-04-08T01:52:00.000+08:00

ok. By may i will finish my school. HOLYCRAP!!!!! 24/7 FREE!

Work .
Meet Yannie
Meet jie.
Meet Ray.
Meet Bro.

Everyday irritate corde.

Design my room.
Paint my room wall
Design mural for room.

CLUB!

GET HUSKY!!!

Get Gucci flats!

Prada hp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GYM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, corde is back. must go do project if not she will nag. Her nag is as scary as a dog barking at thief.

She nag non stop. It's sat night and i m stuck with her, seems like the worst day of the week. Stuck with her almost everyday. CRAP. But stilll love her.

OH, check out the oreos made in japan . ROCKS.

gtg. bye. SHE COMING OVER. DIE

2007-04-05T15:54:00.000+08:00

now, you guys feel that the way i cursed and swear is super piercing right?

Wanna check out why?

Let me tell you.

My bf is a hypocrite. Those 3 third party words which came out of his mouth ought to rise up misunderstanding and cause disputed to fall out.

He assume and never ask. That's why.

He always make me and his friends quarrel, then mine own friends.

HE always nput words in people's mouth because he THOUGHT it's the same but then most of the time he will exaggerate the story and cause a even bigger misunderstanding.

Now i understand why people outside being talking about this behind him.

although he's sweet but all these shit, has overcome his sweetness point. Push me to the verge of tears and decision of leaving him upteen times.

I wonder if I still love him.

I felt dumb.

2007-03-31T09:22:00.001+08:00

Amanda
Anyway i hate kim. She had s*x wif my ex. I hate her! 31 Mar 07 05:43
218.186.64.123

no-one
yup, agree wif pang no war! i donno amanda but i love to read her blog. she's really a pretty babe i can say... Amanda post more of ur photo. (: 31 Mar 07 04:57
218.186.64.123

HOW retarded.

Amanda
so i guess we can break it off from here then. take care 30 Mar 07 20:00
121.7.78.112

Hey.. you should really learn to be smarter.

2007-03-18T16:27:00.000+08:00

Will upload the photos when i have my holidays because time schedule very pack. sorry guys. MEanwhile u can check out my school blog instead.

WWW.AMANDA-HO.BLOGSPOT.COM

2007-03-18T16:23:00.000+08:00

Have you ever done so much for a best friend where by you didn't want him/she know anything. Knowing that your character is mainly expressing yourself thru actions rather by words.

Yes, I'm egolistic.

That's me.

I've been tolerating shits you've done which u might not even know that had hurt me and in case you never know, I m always doing thing delibrately but not towards you.

U never know how hurt it felt when I laid my hands on you. Why do you have to push me to the limits? You motherfucker.

Now that it's over for the friendship for a beginning for a new hatred game.

ok. Back from hongkong then cruise with sweets. WOOTS! shopping. Photos = tons. :(

School has been really very stress up.

2007-03-14T10:51:00.000+08:00

2007-03-14T10:44:00.000+08:00

haven't been updating for really quite awhile

Been really busy with school, boyfriend , holiday in bangkok again with parents and hongkong with my hubbiee.

Currently working on sculpture and sketches. ROCK wait till u see my sculpture. HEE? have really TONS OF PHOTO TO UPLOAD and i miss my parents.

Ytd went back with my hubbie for dinner with my parents . I see they are getting old and weak and this is breaking my heart. They want me to move back and same for me but about what about mel? Sigh. I wish we all could stay together.

Seeing my dad hair balding and turning grey stabs me hard wherelse my mum movements getting fragile.

Mel told me that my mum cried when he's talking to him about me . She admitted that she really spoilt me from young and she kept telling mel to really take good care of me. Telling him alot of things about me which makes me realised that, they are the ones who understands me the best and the only one who could make me break down anytime. I misses them and i love them. Sigh

2007-02-10T05:15:00.000+08:00

Just reached home after sending yannie home.

Had alot of fun initially till i got home. I can't stop but thinking, I can't afford to take the risk after so much failed r/s in the past. I can't trust him . He'shas beeing missing for 2 days and he claimed tht he's sleeping because sick and i just met him in the noon and then he's missing till now, again. He claimed that he's sick since the day b4. how could he sleep so long? And i even called his house where his cousin claimed he's not home.

Been single since april and now , I falling into it again. Reached home , Can't help but cried. Did told people that in a r/s , without trust it will fall but yet I'm contradicting myself.

I can't take it yet i don't wanna lose him either. Studies had been totally affect till I can't even concentrate at all. I can't even skecth or paint anymore. Basically, Just thinking about what he's doing. I know i m sensitive but I can't help it after so much happened.

Should I give up? i can't go on weeping everyday, Thinking and praying he's really sleeping. I can't go on like this....

2007-02-05T23:58:00.000+08:00

Guys, btw, i now have 2 blogs because of school project. WWW.Amanda-ho.blogspot.com is for my school blog. forced to open one. =(

Sweet brought me for shopping spree!

2007-02-02T11:59:00.001+08:00

ahhhh... just pop a few chill pills. Feeling alot betterr.... yeahhhhhhh..... hands shivering thou but feeeeeeeeeeelssss good. heh...

2007-02-02T10:58:00.000+08:00

Now in school. Feel super vexed. Cannot cope with projects.

I don't even feel like talking. I can't even talk. The o nly thing I can do now is cry. I just wanna cry. Fuck.

I can't even talk to corde nor ade.

After bk gve remarks about my art blog, I felt pretty disappointed. I shouldn't have even spend my time on melvin And my sketches? ALL DOWN THE FUCKING DRAIN because i don't have the fucking time to work on it. ALL given to melvin. Fuck.

That's it.

I just wanna cry out loud but that ain't gonna help at all. I realised I really can't cope time with r/s at all . I thought I could.
Melvin gonna start screaming at me for not meeeting him. Then he's gonna stress me out saying I didn't spend time on him. I can't take this no more. He's gonna start pushihng fault to me then gonna strat calling me bitch blah blah this blah blah that.

He's already stressing me out ytd when I had a fight with stan. I just need peace to w ork on my project sketches but he wouldn't leave me alone. He kept calling and calling. FUCK... I really can't stand it anymore. Can't he just be a little more understanding? I just need some quiet time to work on my own stuff. Everytime I get really stress up or vexed or school works.... He will assume that i m pissed with him then he will start annoying me by askin am I piss off with him or why m i so angry... WHEN EVERYTIME I TRIED TO EXPLAIN THAT I M FUCKING TIRED NOT ANGRY. I m sick of explaining upteen times tthat I m not angry at all. I'm just fucking tired.

I m sick of hushing him down like a fucking baby where I was the one who needs to be hush. FUcking hell. I m sick of him. Why is he pressuring me when I m fucking failing my semester now!!!

I don't need his fucking porsche nor his fucking money or penthhouse. I just need someone to understand me. TO hush me down.

I have proojects to rush. I m fucking sick . I m drowning myself with pills daily. 3 times a day. Fucking tired. Why can't he just spare me some space for my own stuff. Fucking self centered.

Just feel drowning myself with sleeping pills. I m sick of life. FUck it.

I m so sick of everything.

2007-01-26T16:56:00.000+08:00

HUNNNNNNNNNNIE WANTS HUBBBBBBBBBBBBBBIE!!!

I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!
I WANT MY HUBBBIE!

HUNNIE WANTS HER HUBBIE NOW!

SORRY LAH... damn bored. Miss blogging. Suddenly damn free. I WANNA BATHE... but got some china motherfuackers fixing my door and they stink my whole room.Tonight dinner with hubbie and the problem now is, i have no idea how to drive to his house. -.- die?

2007-01-26T16:54:00.000+08:00

CORDE! GOOD LUCK FOR YOUR ADVANCE THEORY TONIGHT

although i cant park well or find the direction but for all I know, I pass my basic and everything on first attempt. *beams*

2007-01-26T16:39:00.000+08:00

-.-
:D
awww..... Ain't gonna let her go like others.
hmmm..
Cause then, nobody help me do project and give me direction on the road LOL

heh
my arms dAMN FAt!

heh heh
.. hate it when she always attempt to grab my pink pink.

2007-01-26T16:27:00.000+08:00

SWEET
AdorABLE

boo
HORt! touch me and you will be crushed

bleah?
she's someone I cant lose
She loook like.. arnold?
lolololol
Corde's got poison lips. She attempt to kiss me. eew

Lame
Awww.... this picture damn sweet. i sweeter. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
I LOVE HER!
NOW MY TURN!
CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEze?

eeee.. so scary... 4545647567
Retareded
HA HA HA?
I told you she's ugly

LOL.

2007-01-26T16:22:00.000+08:00

This is what hubbie bought ytd for dinner. I didn't realised all he wanted was dinner with me. We had a big fight. Sigh.. Somehow, we never had any dinner and it was left in the living room till morning.

she's ugly
i m charming

We both are cute

2007-01-26T16:17:00.000+08:00

My work piece. Theme : National education
Jojie's theme. Cyber
Corde : Cyber
heavenly

I have to idea w hat's this doing outside my gate when I was heading out to irritate dear by playing with his doorbell. HE... IS.. a heavy sleeper. Must ring the bell like.... 23435345234234 times then he will wake up. There's once where he never wake up at all... I tot he missing sia. cried like hell... hgfytfiy

2007-01-26T16:10:00.000+08:00

went to meet stan with corde. HEE
Dear was super sweet. Heh. btw.. Was temporary staying at his other apartment, The condo beside parkway. The whole penthhouse PACKED with only me. -.- HE staying on the 19th floor while 22nd was me.
I LOVE dear....
=\

he remembers..

2007-01-26T16:05:00.000+08:00

Dunno what bro doing. LOL?
Tt's my dear on the left. i know you guys thinking. (Amanda's taste....... xxxxx) BUT nvm. Proud to have him around. I M A CHANGED BITCH.
wtf la..
THIS dunno what it's call but shuan introduced. DAMN zai. at arab street the seesha shop.

2007-01-26T16:00:00.000+08:00

I know you always wanted to grab mine cause it's bigger than yours.
like jun on. LOL?!
DAMN BORED LAH...
This is how she really look like before editing her face. SERIOUS

awww..... i love her.

2007-01-26T15:37:00.000+08:00

my Mural WORK piece for the boody kids from fu chun primaryy. SHAG LA... Paint the wall Ht: 3.2 m Length is 10.8m somemore at entrance. shag. TMD. First time do such drawing about singpore. wth.......... ok.

driving dear's porsche. Feeling damn stress cause first time and CORDE still can laugh. nb and yes, I lost my way.. whatever.

The new me

dear was really very sweet.... sigh..

2007-01-26T15:24:00.000+08:00

WEE! My workpiece has been chosen for the bloody primay school. WEE

Things havent been going smoothly. I shouldn't even have fall for somemone knewing that I always get taken for granted. now I m taking the risk again.

I had enough of screaming and crying. all i asked for was just a plain simple normal honest guy with stable financial who really loves me and appreciate me that he will never EVER make any empty promises. That's all I m asking for.

2007-01-24T14:44:00.000+08:00

OMG! haven't blog for weeks. LOTSA PHOTOS!!!!

initially there a problem with the "Hello" programme wherelse, Blogger is fucking lag. Not able to load up.

Recently SUPER busy with school work. DAMN. everyday sleep less than 6 hours and ytd, only 1 hour. god.

Hate last min work but heh.... Always produce something good with last min work. WEE?!

Hmm... I miss you guys and you people never call me. :(

Everyday see corde's face until sian. LOL???!!!

Oh man.. Wanna say I love her lotsa because without her, I won't be in school man. HEH..

Her naggins, Encouragement, Sharp voice , Helping me to do correct my essays and keeping me updated with school.

GOD.... If i met her in brighton, I would have gone to JC. :D

Eh.... ok. GTG. bye.

LAstly. now corde is helping me to do essay. As in rewrite. :D

I LOVE YOU CORDE!!!!

2007-01-14T04:04:00.000+08:00

we were actually insulting his baby

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
more like a deformed pig

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
..

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
wtf

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
worse than a deformed pig

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
..

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
alright

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
it was a bad idea to msg you

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
LOL?

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
a deformed naked mole

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
LOL!!?!?!??!

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
seriously

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
his hair his face his body his everything

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
is totally like a rubbish dump man

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
not those who pick garbage bags

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
ok

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
sweet

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
but those who live by using rubbish thrown by beggars

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
he look like a fucking beggar

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
like a those beggar who have nothing

Amanda love derek - so filled with hatred says:
..

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
no clothes cos he is filled with ugly tattoos

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
like permanent clothes

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
he dun have to was hit

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
wash it*

PRINCESS KIMMIE says:
he dun have to wear anything

http://www.friendster.com/19136250

Remember 2 years back, i did mention that kim and me fought with these two little dwarfs ? fucking hell. I just realised that one of their bf was this motherfucker whom I recalled and currently was my buddy's bro, a mother fucker who's so short and stammered. NOW THEN I REALISED WHY, at tt point of time during the bloody fight, I didn't saw them hiding at one corner. KNN...

sorry, was just ultmately pissed bcuz now, he's still a bastard for the way he treated me buddy. fucking hell. oh ya, this poor fellow is penniless. basically he just out there ought to suck balls for this particular tattoo artist. loser.

yaya, suck more and I hope your little mole get suck too... how cute.

http://www.friendster.com/user.php?uid=17376980